Forms Of Cheating:
Physically Intimate - physical cheating, through intimacy, is the most referred-to form of infidelity within a committed relationship. This form of cheating tends to be the end-all for relationships.
Emotional - emotional cheating is a bit more complicated and may be even more painful than if their cheating partner were in a conventional physically intimate affair. Although emotional affairs do tend to escalate into physically intimate affairs, emotional infidelity is unique in that it does not need to involve physical infidelity. The cheating partner becomes almost obsessed with the other person and talks to them in ways that he does not talk to his or her current partner. There are inappropriate feelings involved beyond what a strong friendship may involve.
Cyber - the internet is such a blessing, but with that come downfalls and one is that it gives partners another route of infidelity. Talking to others inappropriately whether on the internet, through text, or over the phone without your current partner's knowledge may seem petty to the one who is being unfaithful but it is a real and, unfortunately, common type of cheating that may be the relationship's deal-breaker.
Pornography - some people feel that viewing other people be physically intimate is another form of cheating but this opinion is not standard so it is important to know how your partner feels about it before you commit to each other.
Signs To Watch Out For:
- Becomes secretive with his or her phone, computer, e-mail, or social networking
- Money goes unaccounted for
- Long and frequent phone calls in his or her's phone history
- Begins talking about someone in particular incessantly
- New and/or recurrent phone numbers in suspected partner's phone history
- Suspicious debit/credit card purchase history
- Hangs up phone call when current partner walks into room
- Leaves room when receiving phone calls
- New sex patterns; Wants more or less sex than usual
- Starts dressing nicer than usual
- Starts wearing perfume/cologne
- Finds excuses to leave home or seems to become angered from petty arguments and walks out
- Abrupt change in work hours
Keep in mind that while the signs above do indicate that the relationship and suspected partner need extra attention, the signs do not necessarily mean the partner is cheating.
What You Can Do:
Generally, there are only 2 things you can do whether you are the victim or the cheating partner:
- End the relationship
- Work it out
Ending the relationship may seem like the obvious thing to do, but for some people it isn't exactly that simple. Maybe there are children involved. Maybe the victim has no resources so that he or she can leave the relationship without any further hardship. Maybe the relationship was really long and the victim isn't sure of what to do or how to do it.
Working it out may seem like the most forgiving thing to do, but sometimes, even when the affair wasn't that severe, the boundaries have been crossed and trust broken and that may be irreparable. Maybe the victim was cheated on before. Maybe the victim has certain values and morals that he or she can't stand to degrade.
On the other hand, the victim may choose to stay in the relationship physically, but mentally and emotionally disconnect him or her self until he or she can figure out the best option with a cool head. This may take hours, months, or years.
Regardless of what you choose to do in the end, it is important that you don't make your decisions irrationally; Calm down and think clearly first. You need to sit down and plan what you will do and how you will carry it out. The first and most important step, however, is to make sure that you are acting on truth. Before you come to any conclusions you need to gather evidence and approach your partner with it calmly and without making any blatant accusations. Do not divulge how you got hold of your evidence. He or she may deny it entirely, confess, or accept only bits and pieces of what you are presenting.
"It is especially important to remember that when going through issues as touchy as these, and some people may beg to differ, that the person who is victim to this behavior is at NO fault. No matter what you may or may not have done within your relationship, you are not responsible for the choices your partner makes. Ultimately, s/he is the individual who decides to cross any spoken or unspoken boundaries.
On the other hand, if you have had or are having an emotional affair or are viewing pornography that upsets your partner or are talking with others online that your partner is not comfortable with, it is easy to tell your partner that s/he is overreacting. However, you have no idea how far you have crossed boundaries in the eyes of your partner. You have no idea the depth of their pain and their perception of what you have done or are doing. The easiest way to comprehend what they might be feeling is to let go of everything you believe in regarding such, open your mind, and put yourself in their shoes. You may feel you have done nothing wrong since there has been no physical affair, but in the mind of your partner you have already betrayed him/her; You have already lost their trust. Keep in mind that, statistically, most non-physical affairs eventually escalate. The only way to overcome this is to acknowledge your behavior and your partners feelings and take responsibility. "
~Copied from Shedding Light On Convention Facebook Page post~